Questions About Friendship

Ronald was a lonesome man. Every day he woke up alone, ate alone and watched television alone. As part of his daily routine he would also walk through the park, alone. One day while on his walk he sat down on a bench to rest. To his surprise he noticed there was a man sitting beside him with a bucket over his head.
 

โ€˜Helloโ€™, said Ronald. โ€˜Why do you have a bucket over your head?โ€™
The man was unresponsive.
โ€˜I suppose I can understand it,โ€™ Ronald said after a minute or so. โ€˜Sometimes Iโ€™d like to hide under a bucket.โ€™ Ronald chuckled at the thought. โ€˜Yes, I understand it very well,โ€™ he said.
He sat for a few more moments enjoying the silence before saying goodbye and walking home.
The next day he was pleased to find the man there again, despite the wind and rain. Ronald sat beside him.
โ€˜Hello again,โ€™ he said.
The man was motionless.
โ€˜Miserable day, isnโ€™t it?โ€™, Ronald commented. โ€˜Weather like this can make me feel quite blue. Mind you, I often feel that way.โ€™
Ronald turned to the man. โ€˜You know, youโ€™re very easy to talk to,โ€™ he said. โ€˜I havenโ€™t spoken this much to anyone in years.โ€™
The man didnโ€™t reply.
When Ronald returned the next day the man was still there, and once again Ronald sat beside him and chatted.

This continued for several months till one day Ronald was saddened to find that the bench was empty. He sat down and looked around. There was no sign of the man. Ronald stayed there till sunset hoping he would return, but he didnโ€™t.
 

The following day Ronald again found that the bench was empty and, like the day before, he waited there till sunset, just hoping.
This continued for a few more days. Ronald started to worry. He decided to report the manโ€™s disappearance to the police. At the police station Ronald explained that his friend had been missing for several days. The police asked for his friendโ€™s name: Ronald didnโ€™t know it. They asked for a description of his face: Ronald couldnโ€™t offer one. They asked for his age and ethnicity: Ronald had no idea. The police soon lost their patience. 

โ€˜You donโ€™t know anything about this man.โ€™
โ€˜Heโ€™s my friend,โ€™ Ronald replied.
โ€˜Heโ€™s not your friend. Heโ€™s a total stranger,โ€™ they said.
โ€˜We sit together.โ€™
โ€˜Iโ€™m sorry, sir. Unless you can give us some concrete information about this individual, we canโ€™t help you.โ€™
โ€˜I understand,โ€™ Ronald murmured, and walked home, alone.
 

Was the man Ronaldโ€™s friend?

โ€• Is it possible to be friends with a stranger?

โ€• Is it possible to be friends with someone you donโ€™t know?

โ€• If he was a friend, was he a good or a bad friend?

โ€• Can we be mistaken about who our friends are?

โ€• Can you be friends with someone who isnโ€™t friends with you?

โ€• Was Ronald the manโ€™s friend?

This is taken fromย Thinking Beans by David Birch, a marvellous book we published a few years ago. To help everyone do more philosophy this year, we’ve extended the Buy One Get One Free offer in our shop until the end of October. No need for a voucher-code – our elves will just pack two in your box for every one bought.ย 

What’s new in the Philosoverse?

This week, Tom and Jason returned to The Cottesloe School running problem-solving and and debating workshops for Year 12. These days, run through our sister organisationย Hidden Leaders, focus not on independent thinking, but bonding too. With nearly half a term passed since the traditional let’s-make-friends-week”, it’s easy to forget friendships can form at any time of year. We’re now taking winter-time (and winter-rate!) bookings –ย get in touch nowย to start a conversation about how we can work with your students.ย 

Wearing our Philosophy Man hats, we were also presenting and exhibiting at yesterday’s Great Oracy Exhibition in Birmingham. More reports from it next week, including news of our new book on oracy. Thank you if you were one of the many who came over and talked to us about our various offers, from Sticky Questions to Debate Planet (which we launched last week). If you weren’t there, but want to have your chat about either, just email us back now!

Last chance to sign up for our next free webinar

Like the idea of practising skills in a fun way? Our next free webinar to share lots of ideas and also showcase what’s available atย P4C.comย is onย Monday 21st October at 6 p.m. UK time. It will focus on Community Builders – activities that may or may not involve thinking, but which develop the particular skills a group needs to work well together. They can also provide a lively, motivating way to start a session and add variety.

Best wishes,

Tom and Jason

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